Happy New Year everybody! Man, it feels so good to leave 2020 behind. New beginnings are always refreshing, and this one was so needed. That’s why I’m celebrating with an unexpected post!
In the last year, I learned the importance of setting goals and sticking to them. I was always one to make new year’s resolutions, and forget about them within a week. Drive hasn’t always been my strong suit. But I feel like 2020 was a huge year of growth and self-reflection for me, so I decided that I would make this year one of action. I actually want to stick to my resolutions this year.
To do this- I decided to give myself a bunch of little resolutions or goals in different aspects of my life. I spent a few hours and just brainstormed. I thought of things I didn’t like that I wanted to change, things I liked that I wanted to stay the same, and things that I’ve wanted to try but could never find a good enough reason to. I think I was able to create the best list that way. I really recommend you guys try it either for your new year’s resolution, or maybe even a random life audit. Here’s my list.
Stick to my upload schedule (Mondays and every other Sunday)
Redesign my site to something I love and will commit to
Work on sharing more photos with my posts
Spend more time with family and friends (COVID permitting)
Hey guys! It’s been a hot minute since I’ve posted anything on here so I’m checking in to let you all know I’m alive and well.
School’s been keeping me fairly busy. Everyday I’ve got some sort of assignment whether it be a lengthy paper, an online lecture, or reading. I won’t lie though. I’ve had several opportunities to sit down and write this update for you guys, but whenever I went to write something, I got exhausted and needed a nap. I mean, I’m running on barely 5 hours of sleep everyday so do you blame me?
Anyway, school’s been really good so far. I’m currently Team Straight A’s, which is something I’m going to flex until I can’t anymore… because I totally deserve it. I’ve been bringing home 100% quizzes and exams weekly. Don’t ask me how… I haven’t figured that part out yet to be honest with you.
Since I’ve gotten back to school I’ve gotten to catch up with so many friends from last year and I’ve felt my heart grow bigger and bigger. I never realized how much I missed them until I got to see them again and I didn’t want to ever say goodbye to them. I’ve also made a bunch of new friends that I can already see being in my wedding (if there ever is one lol). So I guess my sociability has really expanded since I moved back.
I know you guys know I went through some shit a month ago and was in a really dark place, so I wanted to touch on that real quick (again).
I’m doing so well it’s almost scary. I feel so much more power, confidence, and happiness now. I’ve been doing live streams on Instagram every Sunday where I talk about my trials and tribulations and offer advice and understanding to those who need it. Since I started doing the streams, I’ve gotten so many messages from people who have been going through their own battles. I promised myself that my pain wouldn’t be in vain and that I would use my voice to help others going through things too. Let me tell you- it has been the biggest reward. I’m still working on finding the perfect time to do live streams so that the most people can watch them live, but as of right now I go live at 6 pm EST and it hasn’t been so bad. If you’re interested in watching, set an alarm and be ready with popcorn tomorrow when we talk about confidence!
I’m so excited to bring new content to this blog and solidify what I want this website to be. I know I’ve been really wishy washy about my content and that’s not cool so I’m making it a goal of mine to get my act together and decide on what I’m going to do. I have a lot of things planned, but I want to really think every little move out before I execute it now. In the meantime, check out some of my older posts and let me know what you like best!
I’ve taken a lot of my online presence over to Instagram and Twitter so make sure to follow me on there to keep up to date on things like my livestreams and personal goals!
As most of you probably know by now, I’ve really been going through it this past month or so. Lots has gone on that’s forced me to make massive changes in my life and ultimately turn into a completely different version of myself. I went through a break-up, a move, health concerns, friend drama, my first week of classes, and a lot of little things that started adding up.
Through all of those changes and bumps in the road, there was one thing that kept me grounded. One thing that stayed no matter who/what left- me. Out of all of the mantras of love and happiness that were preached to me through it all, the hugs and open hearts, knowing that I was still here for me was what kept me going.
I had to prove to myself that I have what it takes to make changes in my life that can be beneficial for me. I relied so heavily on other people to give me what I wanted and needed. At the time I didn’t see anything wrong with it. I felt comfortable and secure with where I was at. But now, looking back at who I was even a month ago disgusts me. I wasn’t doing anything for myself. I didn’t want to better myself unless someone else took that first step for me.
A part of me hates admitting that… especially online to people who build their opinions of me on what I say and do on this website. But admitting it is liberating in a way too. Being able to say that that’s who I was and not who I am feels really good. I know a lot of close friends and family were genuinely concerned about me. That added pressure dragged me down a lot. However, I knew that doing what I needed to do for myself would serve as reassurance for both myself and those around me. Since I started hitting my roadbumps, I’ve accomplished a lot. I reserve the right to brag a little since I was able to escape the rut I was in for so long.
I’ve been MIA for a while on here and so I haven’t been able to share my successes with you guys and it’s sucked. I’ve wanted so badly to hop on here and tell you all what I’ve been up to, but I feared that the second I shared it, it would all go away. But now I’m fairly confident that the work I’ve put in so far has put me in a safe spot.
I’m doing really well in my classes and I’ve already made a few of those “we’re-in-the-same-class-so-we’ll-be-friends-for-the-semester” friends. My instructors are alright, I suppose. One of them is already the kind of instructor I wish all of them were- relatable. He likes the same types of music as me and makes my kinds of jokes. I expect a lot of great things from his classes I’m taking.
In the love life department, I’m just doing me. I love myself more than I have ever loved myself. I feel confident and independent, and I’ve been trusting myself to make the best decisions possible. I have definitely met a few guys who have drawn my interest, but I’m not ready to devote myself to anyone other than me right now. I’m so happy with my life the way it is. If I do, however, find someone that I feel I cannot live without, I’ll be careful. Then again, I may not have to be. Now I’ve learned what works and what doesn’t. I’ve learned what I love about love and what I don’t care for. I guess you could say I narrowed down the search. But again, this will all be in due time.
I have some big things in the works that I’m not ready to announce yet, but as soon as things are set in stone, I’ll be announcing it everywhere like it’s my job (I guess it sort of is)!
Finally, thank you to everyone for the support on my last post. I miss you guys and I might just be ready to come back!